Friday, April 17, 2015

Happy Blog Birthday!

This weekend marks the auspicious occasion of our blog's 7th birthday! Who'da thunk it? To honor the milestone, I give you my very first evah blog post... it's colorful! Not very good in terms of composition and grammar and whatnot, but colorful:

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Ice Cubes.

My kids just learned how to make ice cubes. Isn’t that shocking? I guess it’s really not, since they’ve only known ice to come out of the freezer door or the cooler for the duration of their short lives. But what a childhood memory not to have! The old metal ice cube trays with that treacherous lever to disengage the cubes? Then the stack of perpetually cracked, mismatched blue plastic trays that had to be filled even though it took forever?

Kids these days.

But I digress. They are here in my workplace with me today, getting into trouble while I struggle valiantly to stay on task with the writing of my stupid-ass portfolio, which is due in two weeks. My workplace is pretty fun – not so much for ME, but for anyone else under age 10 with time to kill on a Saturday afternoon. So the kids are running from place to place (walking is so dull) on some class of mission, and I bust them going into our deep freezer. I assume that they are stealing popsicles, which has been specifically forbidden today. By me. For no reason other than that mommy is a pre-menstrual bitch so NO. They insist that they were not after popsicles, just ice cubes! Sheesh, mom! I told them where to go for ice cubes – in the regular kitchen freezer. Off they ran.

A few minutes later, they ran by again, with a bucket full of ice cubes. I stopped them to ask if it was hard. It was. I asked them what they had done with the ice cube trays, they said they had put them back in the freezer. Empty? Yeah. I directed them to go back and fill them with water before putting them in the freezer.




Oh my God, what a world.
I showed this entry to Ellie, and she said it screamed for a photo.
I'm not yet sure about posting photos of my kids,
so I went with an ice cube.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Trust the people

I was watching a workshop video the other night titled Awakening Relating, part of the larger yoga immersion I'm doing.

I got a lot out of it, but the thing that impacted me the most, the one tidbit that really helped me to recast a stuck feeling I was having was this: YOU CAN TRUST EVERYONE TO BE EXACTLY WHO THEY ARE.

Bam! It hit me. I mean, is there a truer statement? Maybe, but this is really really true true.

You can 100% trust people to be exactly who they are. This is not always going to be something that you like. Their being-exactly-who-they-are-ness might piss the hell out of you, in fact, or make you uncomfortable, or frustrated, or scared, or myriad other emotions, but you CAN trust that they will be who they are.

I got some nasty emails from my ex last week, prior to seeing this video. They hit my buttons. I remained relatively un-defensive in my replies to the ugly things that were written, but I did not remain undefensive or okay inside, in my reactive mind. I was offended and mad and having thoughts like, "Omg, who is HE to talk?"...."Doesn't he see the glaring hypocrisy in all this?"....  "This is unbelievable!"...."Am I crazy?"

I was so stirred up by the words he had written, that I actually crafted an email to a friend. I wanted to (a) check in to make sure I wasn't, in fact, crazy and (b) (and this is not fun to admit) let her know just how bat shit coo coo my ex is, what nonsense and hate spews forth from his mouth and fingertips. I wanted her to validate my feelings of rage and defensiveness.I wanted her to tell me that he shouldn't be exactly who he is. (Although I didn't realize it at the time.) (note: I did not send the email.)

Here's the rub. He is exactly who he is and "shoulds" suck. He is always going to be exactly who he is, and that is that.

I'm not claiming that I won't get turned around when he lashes out the next time, but this realization, this coming to terms with the fact that we are all who we are, chock full of flaws and grace alike, has provided some solace. You aren't going to change people. To think you can, or to wish that they were otherwise, is really a big fat waste of time and energy, an exercise in crazy.

And I'm trying to cut down on that.

Monday, April 13, 2015

Back In The Day

Back in the old days . . .

. . . way back when . . .

. . . way, way back when . . .

. . .  back in the day, we were very tiny little miniature baby tots . . .

But just now look us!

Now we have Opening Day International Hot Dog Day Extravaganza.

 And now we have gorgeous cousins-and-cousin's-nieces-and aunties. . .

Did somebody say gorgeous aunties?

 And now we have gorgeous friends-and-family-and-Easter-combination-thereof . . .

 Did somebody say fantabulous?

Back in the Day? Back in the Day's got nuthin' on us now.